Mental Health and the Holiday Season: Understanding Triggers and How to Cope

The holiday season can be tough. Really tough. From missing loved ones who are no longer with us to the stress of trying to make the holidays perfect, the end of the year can be a very challenging time.

If you experience feelings of sadness, anxiety, anger or stress during the holidays, you are not alone.  A survey conducted by the American Psychological Association found that 38 percent of respondents experienced increased stress during the holidays. While there are no sure-fire ways to prevent or erase negative emotions during the holidays, there are ways of understanding triggers and learning how to cope.

Recognize those difficult feelings: It’s ok to not feel 100% happy during the holidays. While many aspects of the holidays are joyful, it’s not always a walk in the park. It’s ok to acknowledge and lean into any negative feelings you might be experiencing. Allow yourself to feel these emotions and try not to beat yourself up for experiencing them. Remember: When you’re at the grocery store buying last-minute food for holiday dinner, or shopping at the mall and feeling nostalgic about the past, look at all the busy people around you. Many of them are feeling EXACTLY like you.

Learn to say no: Because the holidays are a busy time of year both at home and at work, it’s important to know that you can say no or set boundaries. Does your boss want to keep you for longer hours during the holidays?  Maybe your child wants the latest iPhone because all of their friends have one even though you don’t have the budget to drop $1000? Perhaps, your parents and in-laws both want you over their house for the holidays even though you were hoping to have a quiet get-together at your house? Don’t overcommit yourself. Just because it’s the holidays, it doesn’t mean you have to take on heavy burdens yourself.

Delegate tasks to others: If you feel like you’re taking on the majority of the holiday season duties such as shopping for presents or planning, preparing, or cleaning up holiday parties, don’t be afraid to delegate some of these tasks to others. No one person should be solely responsible for holiday duties. By evenly distributing tasks this can help prevent you from burning out or letting feelings of frustration or anxiety take over.

Be realistic about your budget: One of the major factors of holiday stress is money. In a survey conducted by Principal Financial Group, a financial investment management company, 53 percent of respondents said money contributed to their stress during the holidays. In 2018, Americans expected to pay $885 on gifts according to a Gallup poll. Finding the extra money to spend during the holidays can be overwhelming and lead to feelings of guilt or frustration. Try to set a budget and be realistic about what you can and cannot spend. While gifts are nice to have, spending time with the ones you love is even more important.

Set your expectations low: We as Americans have self-implemented an expectation that the holidays must be perfect and that everyone must be happy and well-fed. This unhealthy notion is a one-way ticket to Stressville. Maybe it’s because of memories of the joyous holiday celebrations our parents put together, or maybe it’s years of media and advertising telling us we should have picture-perfect celebrations. Life is messy, and the holidays are messy. The holiday turkey might get dry, snow might delay your flight travel, and children get sick. Take a deep breath and try to roll with it.

Schedule your time (especially sleeping): The holidays often feel like a non-stop blur of running errands, attending parties and ensuring your loved ones are happy. Your time can get away from you, and that’s why it’s important to schedule time for naps, meal breaks and even a little exercise. Lack of sleep can cause a slew of issues including feelings of depression, memory loss and a weakened immune system. Also, don’t forget to schedule a self-care day or two. Take the time for a hot bath, meditate, read a book, or schedule a massage.

Get your vitamin D: Speaking of eating well and exercising, it’s important to prioritize you during the holidays. Just because you’re busy doesn’t mean you should neglect your body. Winter months bring shorter days and colder weather depending on where you live. In order to keep up with your vitamin D, consider eating foods high in vitamin D such as fish, cheese, eggs, mushrooms, and fortified foods such as cereal, milk, and orange juice. Or consider utilizing light therapy in replace of the sun. Vitamin D deficiency is no joke, and can cause symptoms such as depression, getting sick, and sleepiness.

P.S. Be careful binging on booze and fast food, and don’t forget to stay hydrated!

Exercise to help combat the blues: Studies have found that exercise can help with depression, sleep, and anxiety. While exercise certainly isn’t the only tool for helping with mental health, it is a helpful tool for some people. Exercise releases endorphins, which are hormones that make you feel happier. The Mayo Clinic recommends 30 minutes of exercise a day, 3-5 times a week; however, even smaller amounts of exercise might be beneficial. We know it’s challenging to find time to exercise during the holidays, but try to find some time before work or on your lunch break.

Honor your loved ones: Missing a loved one during the holidays is particularly difficult. The holidays often bring back joyous memories of time spent with that person, and it can make the present feel overwhelmingly melancholic. Try to find ways to honor your loved one during this difficult time. Grief.com, a website “dedicated to helping everyone deal with the often unknown terrain that comes along with all kinds of grief,” suggests these tips for coping with the loss of a loved one during the holidays: prayer, light a candle for your loved one, create a tribute, share a favorite story, participate in an activity you enjoyed with your loved one, or cancel or change your holiday plans altogether if that makes you feel better.

Talk to your doctor: While all of these tips sound simple enough, mental health is serious business, and we know a day of self-care or ignoring certain triggers is often not enough. If you are concerned about your mental health over the holidays, please talk to your doctor or mental health therapist on ways you can get through the holidays. You do not need to suffer alone.